How do we grow to succeed?
This question has been floating around in my head lately. At the end of the secular year 2024, many of my relatives and friends went to a church to hear messages about how to recap the secular year and face the new challenges in 2025. Although the Torah is clear that our new year is at Pesach, we have substituted it with the tradition of celebrating Rosh Hashanah close to Yom Kippur and Sukkot as the beginning of the Hebrew year. Be that as it may, we know that cycles are fulfilled.
Life is cyclical, coming and going, spinning and turning to begin again. The important thing is not to form the cycles into a flat circle but rather an ascending spiral. To focus more deeply on this portion, we must look at the past of Yosef and Judah, who are at the epicentre of this week’s portion, Vayigash, which focuses on the restoration of order in the relationships in the family of Jacob.
In short, the portion speaks of the dialogue between Judah and Yosef to free Benjamin. Then the Torah teaches us that Joseph can no longer contain himself. He finally reveals himself to his brothers, understanding until that moment that the purpose of his suffering before becoming the viceroy of Egypt was to save the descendants of Yaakov, who would be the future nation of Israel. God had spoken to Yaakov in a dream indicating that they would descend to Egypt, but that they would return to the land of Canaan promised to Abraham. In the end, Yosef solidifies Pharaoh as owner of all the possessions, lands and people in Egypt, and manages to send his family to a fertile land, in Goshen, so that they can settle and be prosperous.
But then, how do we connect the initial question…How to be prosperous in this new cycle? It is common at this time of year, to hear the phrase: “Have a happy and prosperous 2025.” One wonders, do we really understand the scope of this phrase? Honestly, it couldn’t be more Jewish. The world understands that being happy means a smiling selfie, a photo and living joyful moments. On the other hand, being prosperous means being at the top of economic well-being without experiencing any need. To a certain extent, it is valid, but to be honest, it is incomplete.
This portion sums up “being happy and being prosperous.” To achieve both of these things requires effort. We begin by saying: “Vayigash elav Yehudah vayomer” וַיִּגַּ֨שׁ אֵלָ֜יו יְהוּדָ֗ה וַיֹּ֘אמֶר֘ “Judah approached Joseph and said to him.” This portion implies the first practical lesson of life… we must make things happen. Yehuda could have waited and remained silent, leaving Benjamin as collateral. Here we see that Yehuda had changed, possibly with the episode of Tamar leading him to think that being a tzadik is shown in deeds and not in words. He was directly responsible for having sold his brother in the past and for having started the deep pain in his father’s heart. Approximately 22 years after that episode, he was no longer insensitive to the pain of his brothers, perhaps because of the fact of having experienced it firsthand; he had lost two sons (he understood his father’s pain) and two brothers (his two sons Er and Onan) leaving his son Shelah with the pain of this separation, and he saw how God reunited his family by granting him two sons (Lecah and Laadah) and giving his son Shelah two new brothers back. He had also taken on a leading role among his brothers, but it was not yet complete. When doing the previous reading, I do not know what was going on in the heads of all his brothers before the imprisonment of Benjamin, but it seems that the moment he decided to approach and speak, was a turning point in Judah’s consolidation as a leader.
What did Joseph observe about Judah? He denoted a more mature man, not guided by his impulse, by doing things without thinking. We see earlier when he sold his brother, he was driven by the emotion of rejecting Joseph. When he was going to mark his daughter-in-law, Tamar, he would do so marked by his impulse of anger. On this occasion, his impulse to move began (he approached) but he put a sign of taking control of his emotions when he began to speak. God did not change his personality or his emotions, but now Judah took control by focusing his emotions on reason before acting on it. How many people lose business opportunities for not knowing how to manage their emotions! How many people lose their families, homes, and marriages for not knowing how to control their emotions! The path to happiness and prosperity begins by balancing emotions and actions in the form of impulses.
We read below: V.18 “I pray, my lord, that your servant may speak a word in the presence of my lord, and that your anger may not be kindled against your servant; because you are equal to Pharaoh.” Literally, it does not say to speak a word in the presence of my lord, but the expression is “let my words enter your ears.” For the first time the “lion showed that he had the expression of a sheep.” Judah now began to speak with reason, as well as his heart. It denotes humility, not the arrogance he previously showed in the episode of Tamar. In addition, he recognized his position before the viceroy and spoke wisely. To be happy and prosperous, again we must understand our position, be diligent in speaking prudently, but also be honest in our words, because, although you may not believe it, people know when you are not being sincere and honest in what you say and express. For example, I cannot tell someone that I am happy when I have a bitter face; there is no congruence.
Between verses 19 and 34 Judah begins to be honest and sincere and shows that he has now assumed the role of leader among his brothers. Judah separated from his family after the episode with Joseph, and then perhaps due to hunger, they were reunited. Now we see “midah keneged midah – measure for measure”, since Judah sold Joseph as a slave, he is now forced to offer himself as a slave to Joseph (v. 33). Although it is true that Yosef did not have a good relationship with his brothers in the past, I believe that he knew who had sold him. I believe that God had to heal both Yosef and Judah’s hearts because in order to be Israel, there had to be a reconciliation and reunification of the brothers. This topic is so important that the prophet Ezekiel in the Haftarah portion of the week speaks of the offspring of Yosef and of Judah, and how it is necessary to unite them so that they become one. Before God, there are not two kingdoms of Israel; to reestablish and reunite family relationships, honest and sincere dialogue is necessary. It was more than clear that Yosef, as described in chapter 45, was making a superhuman effort to contain his emotions. God was healing him while he listened to his brothers incognito. They had done Teshuvah.
And indeed, with Teshuvah, the balance of all things returns, and Yosef also did Teshuvah for the resentment that may have been in him. Chapter 45 orders everyone to leave the place where the argument with his brothers was taking place. Until that moment, he had been the viceroy, dressed as an Egyptian and speaking an Egyptian language. His brothers did not recognize him. In order not to humiliate them, he made everyone leave his presence, and that is where he was able to release his emotions. Part of balance is to release emotions, something that I personally find very difficult to do, but it is part of being human. We are not made of stone, we are not made of inert material, we are human, and we must show our emotions in a healthy way. Containing emotions brings illness and pain to the soul. That is why it says literally “he began to cry out loud.” I do not know what release of emotions he had, but he must have felt a release in his soul. Only after he released his emotions, he was able to speak and say: “Ani Yosef, I am Joseph.”
At first, his brothers did not believe him. How was it possible that a slave in the conditions of that time could be alive and now a viceroy? Then as Judah did before, he approached (does an action) and it says – they approached. That is, Israel is reunited. He restarted his dialogue confirming that he was Joseph, HIS BROTHER, and confirmed the fact that only those who were at the pit knew: “the one you sold.” At this moment Joseph understood why they spent 22 years of pain, sadness, bitterness, humiliation, harassment, physical tiredness, and exhaustion, among many other experiences that a slave lives. And he repeats three times “God sent me before you.” The issue was no longer personal, the issue was that God makes everything well in His time. So, to be happy and prosperous, one must not regard today as the end, but as the means that God has arranged for us to grow, always keeping in mind that the present life “is for my good.”
So, although I could go into much more detail in the following verses that are associated with the same theme, we can say that the road to happiness and prosperity is not an easy path, but rather a winding one full of vicissitudes, in which God will make us go through moments that are not so easy, such as facing our painful past, dealing with those people who are not so accessible to us, and reaching the point of balance between emotions and actions.
I wish that this secular cycle of 2025 be good, that the time that passes between Hanukkah and Pesach will be good, and that the light that illuminated us at Hanukkah helps us to be light to those around us. The best of the best for everyone.
Shabbat Shalom
Mauricio Quintero